Why Hello Monday.

Blondie's day began as it normally does. She was awakened sometime between 0600-0630 by the incessant tapping from the kitties. First one and then the other. There is no way to avoid said tapping. Kitten uses what Blondie believes is one claw and taps either her head or her face. She is not sure about the claw count because her eyes are, more often than not, closed. She shoos him away and puts her head mostly under the covers. This just encourages the other kitty to take his turn.

He isn't too proud to reach into the covers and tap her face, gently, but his tapping is accompanied by a chorus of very loud merow's. None of this is conducive to sleeping and Blondie eventually ask them if they want winna winna {chicken dinna} to which both kitties usually respond with a very loud meow and they will both bound off the bed IF they see her actually moving. If Blondie is not moving as if to get out of bed they wait at the edge and look back at her with most disapproving eyes.

Once the cats are fed Blondie sits down to a cup of coffee and begins to check emails, watch the news and generally wake up. Her second cup of coffee sees her putting together a box of goodies to send off to Rudy. {Don't repeat what you hear here but there is quite an array of yumminess inside that box. A loaf of orange bread made using the juice and shredded zest from the orange tree outside our bedroom. Two hot cross buns set aside for him from Easter. Freshly baked peanut butter oatmeal chocolate chips cookies. 4 oranges from the other orange tree outside the kid's bedroom on the other side of the house. ooooh. I can't tell you any more because we all know he is reading this. Tee hee.}

The box is addressed, packed and sealed up and Blondie heads out to the packing store. She loves this store. Blondie can mail a pkg, buy whatever she might need stationary-wise and drop off those annoying packing peanuts that always seem to find a way into her house. Today she had a HUGE box filled with packing peanuts from a few months ago when Rudy shipped one of his guitars to CA. Since Blondie had spoken to the woman at the packing store previously she knew that she would not only take the peanuts but also the huge ass box. YaY!

Shipping paid for. Big ass box dropped off. Blondie - almost skipping back to her car. And then Monday began. As she nears her car Blondie sees - NO. Seriously? WTF??? Yes. Packing peanuts. They somehow escaped the big ass box while she was pulling it out of her car. Now it defeats the whole point of recycling if those escaped peanuts are left to fly away willy nilly, doesn't it? Of course it does. What's a Blondie to do? Well, chase after them of course. {For those who do not know, Blondie now lives in a place referred to by the locals as BlowMont. The reason being that the town is located in a pass and almost always has breeze and often has wind.} But off Blondie goes to chase down those peanuts. She must have looked quite silly or crazy darting there and here scooping up peanuts that were laughingly dancing in the wind.

Why Hello Monday.
Nice to see you have arrived with a bit of a fanfare.

Once the peanuts were picked up and stuffed into her pockets, Blondie returned to her car and headed home hoping that she had gotten them all but sure she must have missed a few. grrr. Next time she will be so much more careful.

Cut to the afternoon. Blondie and the kid do yard-work. Today they are tackling the jungle that the backyard has become. The kid is in charge of mowing and Blondie works the weed whacker. They go about their tasks and Blondie is thinking she is making a good dent in the jungle when she notices that the weed whacker doesn't sound quite right. She stops for a moment and then starts it back up again. Again, she thinks, something isn't quite right. Now she stops and turns to look at the weed whacker motor area and realizes that smoke is pouring out of it. Now that isn't right and she yells to the kid to unplug the cord. {He later laughs at her while telling her that he was thinking *wtf is she doing, put the dang thing down you crazy woman. It is easier to put grass that is on fire out than it is to put Blondie that is on fire out.* tee hee} Blondie killed the weed-whacker. It didn't just burn up. It burnt slap up. That is as bad as it gets.

Why Hello Monday.
Lovely that you are keeping pace with me today.

Since her weed whacking duties have been curtailed due to the unfortunate burnt slap upping of the machine Blondie is now relegated to pulling weeds around the trees. Not so bad, really. Well.Until she snorted an orange blossom that hadn't bloomed yet. It was literally stuck in her nostril. Now usually Blondie would run for the camera in cases such as this but she was off her game due to the holding of the smoking and on fire weed whacker so you will truly just have to take her word for it on this one.

Why Hello Monday.
Aren't you tired yet?

Blondie went head to head with Monday and Monday won. Did we truly expect anything different? All Blondie knows today, as she sits admiring her half cut yard drinking a screwdriver made with freshly squeezed orange juice, is that

Monday truly is the Root of All Evil.

p.s.
As if to add insult to injury {perhaps literally even} as Blondie got up to make dinner she stopped short and let out a gasp of pain. Monday, not one to call it a day early, decided that Blondie's day would not be complete without a little back spasming.

Seriously, Monday?

And you wonder why people have a case of you each week?